Texts from [the] Last [few] Week[s], parte dos

My friends tend to start the week on a positive note: 

I mean, if that’s not inspiring, I don’t know what is. 

But then you realize the optimism stems from the fact that they’re on vacation.

Or heading there. On a dramamine high. 

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Good luck at the office, old sport. Usually, the good mood lasts for about a second. 

But priorities. Have you seen that awful movie that could have been as good as Bridesmaids but wasn’t?

Other questions I get during the week:

I also go by the name of Google. 

Important, thought-provoking conversations are had often. 

Where is America headed? What is it doing to its citizens? Actually never mind. Because it’s birthday week, I’m reminded often that my youth is almost gone. In nice ways, you know. 

I WASN’T FREAKING OUT ABOUT IT OR ANYTHING OK?

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My friends always clarify when needed. And are helpful in plotting revenge. Translation: push him off a bridge

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Finally, they close the week off by dispensing useful information. FACEBOOK DOES NOT DISCRIMINATE. EVEN IF YOU HAVE REASONABLE REASONS.

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LEARN YOUR LESSON.